HBS Might Have the Money, but HKS Has the Glory
by Victoria Criado, Asst. Culture Editor on November 20, 2008 in Culture
The world stopped for half a second on November 9. A ray of light cut through the dusky sky and descended upon the Quadrangle Recreational Athletic Center. It was at that moment that the all-male, Harvard Kennedy School volleyball squad delivered its final offensive blow against its badly battered HBS counterparts during the first KSSG-sponsored volleyball tournament. Amidst the loud and proud cheers of a crowd of three supporters, the HKS team emerged victorious, forging a path of glory for generations of Kennedy students to come.
It was by no means an easy fight – the HBS All-Stars (a self-proclaimed title) swung punches ‘til the very last second of the game, precluding the HKS Good Guys (I swear I’m not making this up) from achieving a swift and successful win in the third set. What ensued was a protracted battle characterized by blood, sweat (and I mean A LOT of male perspiration), and no tears (nope, no tears). The game was riddled with lethal serves, 45-degree angle kills, and the kind of floor diving and flailing arms and legs that might make your grandmother a little uncomfortable.
Whether you believe in absolute truths or not, one thing is clear: volleyball is kind of cool. Knee pads aren’t cool; though volleyball players do wear knee pads. Spiking (or killing) is really cool, especially when followed by a loud grunt of victory or exasperation (in the latter case the player misses the court by a mile, but the sheer force of the kill maintains its cool factor). Jump serves are definitely cool, but witnessing the mark of heavy pancakes (i.e. large circles of sweat visible in the underarm region) is pretty un-cool. For those of you who have never played volleyball, but did grow up in the United States during the 1980s, let me put it to you this way:
Remember how MacGyver could prevent nuclear annihilation with a stick of gum and a toothpick? Well, that was pretty cool. Remember how the American Gladiators wore spandex and basically did nothing the entire show, during every show ever made? Well, that was pretty lame. Volleyball is not lame; it is, in fact, pretty cool. Ergo, MacGyver would probably play volleyball, but he would most likely not want to be a contender on “American Gladiators.” Perhaps this is a slightly unfair comparison but one that carries much logic and weight.
In conclusion, the HKS Good Guys scored yet another victory in the fight for extracurricular recognition amidst the ever-challenging Harvard consortium of sports. You might have missed it this time around. Perhaps you were too busy studying at the library (borderline lame); or perchance you were too busy eating a sandwich (cool neutral); or possibly you were too engrossed in eating a sandwich while studying at the library (reckless and prohibited). But whatever the reason, let it be a thing of the past. In the future, when the pride and honour (yes, “honour” with a “u”) of the Kennedy School stand at a crossroads, let us come together on the court and on the sidelines to proclaim our mental and physical prowess. And for those of you who remain unconvinced, I ask of you but one thing: What would MacGyver do? I say he would play.
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